Distractions are helpful in recovery

One of the helpful things for me in recovery was distracations. People (and doctors/therapists etc) have different opinions on this. Some say that it is better to just sit with the anxiety, fear and guilt. To just sit and breathe and feel those feelings and know that it will pass and that each time you can just sit with those feelings until they pass you get stronger and realise that those feelings can't harm you, as long as you are strong enough to not react upon them. And i understand this, and i do think it is good... i mean you cant distract yourself forever, that is like running from the problem.You do need to face the anxiety, fear, guilt or other emotions/feelings you get. You need to know that you are strong enough to face them  and that they wont harm you, they are just feelings/emotions and it's when you react upon them that they cause harm and get stronger. Because you are strong enough to just sit with them and let them pass.

However, just sitting and breathing when you have tremendous guilt or anxiety, that is not an easy task and for me i had to have distractions. I could not sit still, even now i still need to do things with my hands mostly because of restlessness, but things such as colouring or scrolling through Tumblr are great distractions when i do feel anxiety creeping in. Distractions are also a healthy coping mechanism... i dont really know if i should call them distractions, because they are more a healthier coping mechanism. Such as colouring, that is a way of coping as well as distracting yourself from what you are feeling... it helps your thoughts to focus and you do something with your hands and you feel less likely to do something stupid and if you sit long enough you will realise that those strong feelings have passed. Other distractions are knitting, brodery (?), laying puzzles, drawing, making jewellery, doing something intricate, sowing etc Things that get you to focus on other things rather than your emotions are a good way of coping and distracting yourself and you can feel more at peace. You can feel both your body and mind relaxing, so i recommend finding something to help you cope.

For me i did most of those things mentioned above while at Mando. I had alot of guilt over the food eaten and the fact that i couldnt exercise. I felt guilt over my body, how my body changed, i felt angry and had alot of anxiety 99% of the time but i found that laying puzzles was my way of focusing on other things. I couldnt sit still and just watch series or films which was what was recommended, but i couldnt... i had to do other things because if i just sat still and watched a film or read then my mind would wander and i would end up panicking. So doing things with my hands was a way for me to cope and i can recommend it. Also when you are in treatment or just at home and need to eat and rest, then learning a new skill via youtube can be a good thing. You can emmerse yourself into new hobbies and try new things. Some girls at Mando liked to paint their nails and do intricate nail art or do hair styles and sometimes make up, though we werent allowed mirrors so you would only get 5 minutes or so to look in the mirror in the morning.

I think a balance of distractions/healthy coping mechanisms as well as just sitting with the emotions/feelings is good, i mean you cant distract yourself forever. There will be times when you cant distract yourself and you need to sit with those feelings - such as the first time going out to eat or staying away from home or on holiday etc then you need to be able to cope with the feelings. Then i recommend having a mantra or motto to keep repeating to yourself and maybe take sometime to just take deep breathes, even if you need to go to the bathroom and just sit down for a few moments to calm yourself. I had to do that plenty of times (though if you have had a problem with purging - then ask someone to follow with you to the bathroom just incase. Sometimes the strong emotions or guilt can make you do stupid things.

Find what works for you, whether just sitting and meditation or just sitting with your feelings or distractions. Know that you are stronger than the anxiety, fear and guilt and that those things wont kill you.


No exercise in recovery - replacement method
Meditation 

Link love

I thought i would share some recently found links/articles/recipes which i have found, which you might also enjoy!!


The cost of getting lean: Is it really worth it?

Free compliments (Seriously, if you are feeling bad... go onto this site :))

Make your own space (this is cool! & good distraction!)

Back to school links

12 signs that your relationship to exercise is unhealthy (might have to scroll down)


Seniors show how tattoos will look in 40 years time 

How to deal with the bully inside your head

Draw something (Keep your mind off of things)

Do nothing for 2 minutes

146 things to do beside self harm

9 Milkshake recipes



Raw vegan brownies recipe



Cinnamon roll mugcake



Chocolate oreo parfaits



If you like this type of post, let me know :) Its just a bunch of random cool things or interesting articles which might be interesting to some. I mean, sharing is caring... so also, feel  free to share any of my posts on Google or other sites if you like them :)

What to do when on your own

I got asked if i could suggest some things to do when you are on your own for a weekend. This can be good for those of you who are in treatment and get 'time at home' where you might be on your own. So here are some things you can do!! Note some of them are more active things, so depending on what stage you are in you might skip those suggestions :)

1. Take a long bath/shower
2. Start a new series and watch loads of them/have a movie marathon
3. Read a new book
4. Have a spa day/evening
5. Buy some delicious snacks and foods
6. Redecorate a room
7. Paint/draw/write
8. Watch youtube tutorials
9. Experiment in the kitche/bake
10. Exercise
11. Yoga or meditation
12. Play sims or other computer games
13. Go to bed early/wake up late
14. Go for an adventure somewhere 
15. Clean your room/house
16. Play music loud (if it wont disturb your neighbours)
17. Download new games or apps on your phone
18. Go to town
19. Go to a library
20. Sit in a cafe and enjoy your time alone
21. Download podcasts
22. Watch TED talks
23. Get your haircut
24. Buy new clothes
25. Browse online stores

Just some things anyway!! It can be boring to spend 2 whole days on your own but what i most often do is 1) workout 2) watch loads of series or movies 3) bake and eat 4) take long showers and pampering sessions and 5) clean my room as well as alot of just walking around the house because I can :) I mean, when i am home alone i can do pretty much whatever i want ;););)

What are YOUR favourite things to do when you are home alone? :)

The meditation book

It is a place for you to write down all your desires and dreams. It is a place to express self-love & gratitude so you don’t forget it. It gives you confidence, motivation, inspiration and focus. And more importantly, it is an instant mood booster. Below I break down 5 important categories to start you on writing a meditation journal. Go out and buy a new, pretty journal and start this today. 

• Affirmations:
  write down the things you like about yourself. Don’t worry about how insignificant it may seem, anything counts. It can be something physical such as “I have pretty hair”. Or a talent, like “I am a good cook”. Or a personality trait like “I am a good listener”. Think about compliments you have received from people and write those down too. Don’t worry about how conceited & narcissistic it comes off. This is the time to be self-centered. Drown yourself in compliments. 
• Goals: 
  think about the things you want out of life. It can be tangible things like you want a new house or financial stability. Or just general goals of what you want out of life, who you want to be, where you want to be etc. Don’t worry about how far fetched or unattainable it seems. Dare to dream BIG. Write it down & add details to it. You want to find a companion, write down the traits you want in them. Focus on it & believe it will happen. 
• Quotes:
  yes, quotes can be cheesy and cliche at times, but the right ones will have the uncanny ability to resonate with us on a deeper level. Sometimes we need to see the world from someone else’s perspective and learn from their wisdom and insights. That confirmation that others experience what we do gives us motivation & connection. The best quotes bring us enlightenment & awareness to ideas we previously overlooked. Write down song lyrics, quotes, book excerpts, poems etc. that inspire you and make you think.
• Gratitude:
  we often focus on what we don’t have instead of realizing what we do have. Expressing what you are grateful for right now at this present moment, is the path to happiness. It can be small things like “I’m thankful for this sandwich” or bigger things like “I am grateful to have parents who love me unconditionally. The attitude of gratitude makes you experience & appreciate life with more passion and joy.
• Visualization:
  the combination of repeating these affirmations & goals with visualizing them, increases their effectiveness. The phrase “seeing is believing” is the truth. Look online or through magazines and cut out pictures of the things you want. Paste them in your journal and focus on them.

Read through this journal every morning before you do anything else. If you have to wake up 10 minutes earlier to fit it in, do it. It may be the single most important thing you do in the entire day. Make the time. Then read it again before you go to bed. Let the words sink in. Feel them. Actually feel the words you are reading to yourself fill up inside you manifesting and becoming a part of you. The words on the page will become so ingrained into you that you’ll know them by heart. You’ll be amazed at how therapeutic it is to just create this journal. Take the time everyday to check in and focus on yourself.

This is a guideline, not a rulebook. Add more categories, or take away some that you don’t like. Cross out things & add more to it as you journey through life. You change, so your journal will reflect that. Be consistent. Make it a part of your routine so it becomes a part of you. Read it whenever the mood strikes you. When you are doubting yourself, or feeling down, read it. The power lies in you. Believe it.

Source

Spending your whole day just waiting for your next meal

When your whole focus is on food and you spend all your time thinking about food, planning your next meal, watching the clock and waiting for your next meal. That is not a healthy thing... not if its an everyday thing.

  Of course it happens during the weekends when i do absaloutly nothing, then its like all i do is eat and look forward to my next meal time when im hungry again... or there is some boredom eating because i have nothing better to do. But when the only thing on your mind is food and its the only good thing or focus in your day/thoughts, then its not healthy thinking. It becomes obsessive and you need to break the food thoughts.

Recovery is about normalizing food, when food is no longer the focus in your life, but its PART of your life because you need to eat!! Your body needs food and energy, somedays you eat more, some days less. Somedays you get intense cravings and you cant stop yourself from just thinking about that craving, but then go eat that food and the cravings will be over. If you avoid your cravings you will keep thinking about it and it takes over your thoughts. Cravings are a sign that there is something in that food which your body needs, so thats why your body wants it.

So how to stop the food thoughts? Well doing something else with your time. Your day should not be spent counting down the minutes, looking at the clock all the time waiting for your next meal or constantly planning your next meal. Instead you need something to do with your time and thoughts. If you are an inpatient or recovering at home and not allowed to do so much, then its easy that your thoughts wander but try to find something creative to do then like:

Collages

Painting

Drawing

Writing

Doing puzzles

Colouring books

Creating crafts

Sudoku

Word searches

Watching Youtube tutorials

Create jewellery

Play online games

Download phone apps

For me when i spend weekends doing nothing and just at home and have a tendency to boredom eat then i do something productive that distracts me. Cleaning, writing down goals, writing, planning, writing to do lists, studying, sorting things in my room. And when i have lots of time over then i like making collages and things :) 

   Otherwise things like painting your nails, doing face masks, nail tutorials etc are good ways to distract yourself or even hair tutorials if you enjoy those types of things!! Be creative, find ways to distract your thoughts.

  Call a friend or family member, if you are allowed schedule to meet someone or do something!!! (And if you are away for many hours then make sure to still eat, just because you are distracting yourself from constnatly thinking about food doesnt mean you dont eat. It just means that you do other things inbetween your meals than just sit and think about food).

Constant food thoughts, food planning and food obsession isnt healthy and you need to focus on other things in your life and change those obsesssive thoughts!! Food should not be your main focus in life!!! Food is energy which your body needs, but there is more to life than food :)

101 things to do instead of binge eating (or other urges)

First of all, recovery is possible. You are worth more than your disorder and don’t have to give in to it. I’ve just had a lot of asks about this lately and thought I’d make a post. You can also use most of these things instead of purging.

1.)Call a friend, your sponsor, a support person, anyone who you can talk to who will either get your mind off of food, or someone to talk to about whatever it is that you might be feeling.

2.)Go for a walk

3.)Drink a cup of tea

4.)Meditate or listen to a hypnosis or guided visualization download.

5.)Give yourself a manicure/pedicure– can’t binge with wet nails.

6.)Volunteer at the SPCA to walk dogs or pet cats.

7.)Go to a movie if the food there is not a trigger.

8.)Watch a funny movie at home.

9.)Take a shower, give yourself a hot oil treatment, shave your legs, tweeze your brows– self care time.

10.)Get organized: sort out your bills, create a budget– organize your home, your closet, your life! Often getting organized can help you feel more in control and enable you to thwart a binge, which can often feel very out of control.

11.)Draw, paint or color.

12.)Knit or do needlepoint

13.)Take a nap

14.)Get out of your house and into your car, go to the beach, the lake, the park… somewhere pretty and relaxing.

15.)Clean out your closet, donate your old clothes or sell them on eBay.

16.)Go window shopping.

17.)Read a good book.

18.)Clean!

19.)Put on music and dance it out.

20.)Go out dancing.

21.)Call your friends over and have a dance party.

22.)Go to the gym.

23.)Stretch, go to a yoga class, do a yoga DVD or an exercise or yoga class on OnDemand cable.

24.)Take a relaxing bath with nice bath salts or essential oils.

25.)Write in your journal

26.)Move! Do jumping jacks, run in place, anything to move a little energy and release some tension.

27.)Scream into a pillow.

28.)Pray

29.)Go to an OA or EDA meeting, either online, in person, or on the phone.

30.)Go to an online support forum with other people dealing with  eating issues.

31.)Read a (non triggering) magazine

32.)Write  a blog!

33.)Twitter!

34.)Read personal journey blogs about others recovering from binge eating. For instance,  Eating Journey, Healthy Girl, Recovery Discover, You’d be so pretty If…, Curbing the Crave, or The Binge Diary.

35.)Sing!

36.)Get your hair done or do your own hair. Experiment with different styles, curling iron, flat iron, curlers, etc.

37.)Make cards for people, catch up on Thank You notes, send out notes to relatives you haven’t spoken to or seen in a long time.

38.)Go out and take photos.

39.)Scratch things off your “to do” list

40.)Play video games.

41.)Play scrabble online

42.)Chat with friends on facebook or update your facebook profile

43.)Write and direct a short play with stuffed animals or Barbie dolls or action figures or your pets or sock puppets and videotape it to put on youtube.

44.)Download MP3s

45.)Give yourself a foot massage

46.)Smell lavender

47.)Pick flowers

48.)Garden

49.)Create a collage

50.)Go bowling/miniature golf

51.)Scrapbook

52.)Write an angry letter to whomever you are holding anger at. You don’t have to send it, just let it out.  Afterwards, put it somewhere safe. You might let go of some emotions that you’d been stuffing and you might find that you no longer have the urge to binge.

53.)Go through old pictures

54.)Cuddle with your boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, daughter, son, cat, dog, teddy bear, etc.

55.)Do karaoke, you can either go out to do it, or do it at home with OnDemand Cable if you have it.

56.)Water your plants– if you don’t have any, go out and buy some plants!

57.)Go through your closet and donate all clothes that are too big, too small, out of date or unworn. Keep the clothes that you feel good about yourself in.

58.)Zone out in front of the TV, catch up on your shows– as long as television is not a binge trigger.

59.)Play music! If you play an instrument, whip it out and start playing. If not, teach yourself to play one. Beat on some bongos, ping a triangle, strum a guitar, whatever is convenient to you. If nothing, make an instrument out of household objects and play it.

60.)Tell the binge that you are stronger than it. You are stronger than the urge to binge. Just because you want to, doesn’t mean you have to.

61.)Brush and floss your teeth

62.)Catch up on your emails

63.)Learn a new language!

64.)Make a rubber band ball. Try to beat the guy who made the world’s largest rubberband ball.

65.)Write a letter to your future self, your recovered self about what you’re going through right now.

66.)Write some notes with positive messages and post them around your home or get out of the house and put them up in dressing rooms, public restroom mirrors, restaurants, — help Operation Beautiful!

67.)Make a list of why you rock. Think about what’s great about you. Can’t think of those things? Call someone who loves you and ask them to tell you.

68.)Spin around in circles like a *Whirling Dervish.

*Whirling Dervish (wurl-ing dur-vish) n. 1. A mystical dancer who stands between the material and cosmic worlds. His dance is part of a sacred ceremony in which the dervish rotates in a precise rhythm. He represents the earth revolving on its axis whileorbiting the sun. The purpose of the ritual whirling is for the dervish to empty himself of all distracting thoughts, placing him in trance; released from his body he conquers dizziness.

69.)Light candles and incense and relax

70.)Explore your neighborhood or town.

71.)Call a friend or relative who has been unhappy lately and needing some support. Sometimes giving support can be incredibly heartening and also supports the supporter.

72.)Use crayons to color hard! This can release tension.

73.)Build a terrarium.

74.)Search through your couch and house for change! Put everything you can in a jar and put it aside to start a fund for yourself as a motivator in your recovery. Every time you reach a milestone (ie: no bingeing or restricting for one week) you can buy yourself something fun, like a new pair of shoes, or some jewelry or new CD, or whatever you like within reason.

75.)Write a long, heart wrenching letter and stick it in a bottle and send it off.

76.)Roll on your back. This is a spinal massage that helps you to feel relaxed and rejuvenated.

77.)Drink a glass of water.

78.)Play solitaire

79.)Read positive affirmations.

80.)Write out your intentions or personal goals for yourself for the week. Write out both long term and short term goals- things that you are striving for and ways to help you get there.

81.)Throw a temper tantrum! Go into your bedroom, lay on your stomach in your bed and scream into your pillow while you kick your legs and punch your hands into the bed. Ever see kids do this? They expend all that energy and it moves right through them. As adults, we can’t really do this and lots of anger and pain winds up feeling stuck in the body. We often try to stuff that down with food and for some, get rid of it by purging.

82.)Plan a party or get together or weekend trip with your friends.

83.)Go bowling, play pool, play golf or miniature golf, play basketball, hit tennis balls, go to a batting cage.

84.)Beat up your pillow.

85.)Make jewelry out of household items or beads or coins.

86.)Smell aromatherapy oils.

87.)Paint your garbage can.

88.)Make stuffed animals or throw pillows out of old clothing.

89.)Give yourself a facial treatment.

90.)Look through old pictures.

91.)Pretend that you are a tourist in your old city or town. Look up things to do that tourists would do and do it!

92.)Teach yourself to juggle.

93.)Go to the museum or the zoo. If it’s not the right time, go to an online museum and learn all about art.

94.)You can also take that old clothing, especially those that are significant to your eating disorder days, and cut it up into squares and make a “recovery quilt.”

95.)Make a cootie catcher with positive messages inside.

96.)Do a home makeover! Rearrange your furniture, get rid of things that you no longer want– sell them on eBay! Put up some curtains, just make things pretty for yourself.

97.)Do online crossword puzzles or sudoku or boggle.

98.)Enter sweepstakes.

99.)Do volunteer work.

100.)Write a novel, short story, or poetry.

101.)Fight Procrastination! Do homework, write that paper you’ve been putting off, work on your dissertation (ahem…)

Source X

Distractions that can help - with others & inspiring

Distractions that can help - Fun

Distractions that can help - comforting & constructive

Distractions that can help