Recovery, fat/weight gain & exercise

Since posting the pictures of me in my sports bra, my inbox has overflown with messages of how i got my body to look the way it does... how i got my stomach so toned. But also so many people telling me that they abuse exercise trying to shape their body and keep from gaining fat. Gaining fat seems to be the worst thing possible for so many people. All they want is their flat stomach and abs.

Lets begin with 1) I am ME. I look the way i do due to genetics, having CF and what i eat how i exercise. You could do the exact same thing as me, but you still wouldnt look like me.

2) I am a healthy weight, a healthy body size, a healthy BMI and have a healthy mind.

3) I began exercising - with short walks - when i was 2-3kg away from my goal weight. I did get into some bad exercise habits after a while as i didnt know how to workout and wasnt really listening to my body so began over doing it with cardio and eventually burnt out. Then i changed my ways and in the beginning of this year i began strength training and focusing on that. But you can read my exercise journey HERE & HERE and how i built up strength


The first thing to remember is that your body NEEDS fat. It is essential... you cant go your whole life scared of fat. You need to face those fears. Ask yourself EXACTLY what is it about having fat on your body or gaining fat that is so scary?
   Everyone has fat on their body and without it, you feel cold, your body grows extra hair, you feel tired as all energy goes to trying to keep you warm.
  I also get alot of people telling me they strengt train just so that they dont gain fat and this is WRONG. You should strength train to get stronger and because you enjoy it... not just so that you dont gain fat. But also, its extremely hard to just gain muscle without gaining fat. It doesnt work that way... and when you dont eat enough and just strength train and do lots of cardio, you break down your muscles and you dont get stronger you just get weaker.
Post: Why i strength train & gaining weight while strength training

To combat your fear of fat and fat phobia here are some posts that can help you:

People are more scared of having fat than dying
Fat is not a feeling
Fat phobia
How to get past the fat feelings


You need to realise that exercising and trying to change your body WILL NOT bring you happiness, it WONT fix your bad body image issues. Instead, you need to face whats in your head:
Fixing your attitude instead of your flaws (post) Dont focus on what you need to change on your body, focus on changing whats in your head.


If you struggle with over exercising HERE is a master post of posts whcih can help you.
HERE is a replacement method for exercise in recovery (Coping with no exercise)


And here are some posts which ive written my thoughts about abs and my body which seem to have gotten alot of readers and likes.
My thoughts: Abs
Genetics or hard work

I know this post was just a bunch of links to other posts but instead of writing everuything out again (because as you can see ive already written so much about these topics, i thought reading the older posts might help you!).
 
You need to realise that
 1) Your body NEEDS fat.
2) Having fat on your body doesnt make you ugly/lazy/unpretty or any other things. It makes you YOU and healthy.
 3) You need to fix your attitude and thoughts towards your body instead of fixing your body.
 4) Dont compare yourself to others.
5) Exercise because you enjoy it not because you want to change your body. If you dont like exercise, thats fine. Then dont :)

How to get past the fat feelings

The first thing to do when it comes to fat feelings is to realise that they are Feelings, and not the truth.

But also, fat feelings are often something else. Because well, you can't feel fat... I mean, i can't feel skinny or feel toned etc... You can look it, and i mean there are times when you just think Damn i look good... and its almost like you feel a certain way. But that feeling is not feeling thin, but its feeling happy. Because you put your happiness in the way you look.

When it comes to fat feelings its often due to anxiety, stress, anger, irritability, sadness, tiredness.... For me, when i get fat feelings its either 1) due to hormones and that time of month or its 2) because i havent eaten enough and am tired. Then i can end up feeling fat, though i know that the truth is i amnt. Why would i suddenly go from feeling good in my own body to suddenly being fat?
 
But also, the feelings can be triggered by things like fullness, stress, bloating. But those are just normal bodily feelings, they shouldn't make you feel fat. Its ok to feel full, its ok to bloat, its ok to eat. So those types of feelings shouldn't be connected to negative feelings.

I suggest that you write down when you get the fat feelings and what has just happened, what are you thinking, try to analyze your own feelings.Yes, i know i sound like a therapist now and you might be thinking... i feel fat. I dont feel anything else. I am fat. But you know the truth.... and think like this, if you are underweight or in recovery and need to gain weight. The chances of you being overweight are very unlikely (if you need to gain weight, that is.)
   But then maybe you are more on the curvy side or are bigger and have fat feelings, thats ok as well. There is nothing wrong with that, but once again... they arent feelings of being fat. They are something else... and you need to tackle those feelings.



You also need to ask yourself what is so wrong with being fat? Having fat. We ALL have fat. I have fat. If i lean over or sit down i get tummy rolls... i can pinch fat from my stomach, arms, legs etc... Do i do it? No i dont. Because it is ESSENTIAL FAT. Fat which i need on my body. It keeps me alive. It keeps me warm. So what if i gain some more fat, that wont harm me in any way. Neither would it make me any less me, it wouldnt make me any unhappier or make me hate my body.

You need to realise that fat is something which your body needs and some naturally have and need more of it than others. However, DONT look at those people who compete in fitness competitions or have very low fat procent because that ISNT healthy. Both males and females need a certain amount of fat, and you need to get rid of the fear of having fat on your body.

Back to the actual fat feelings. You need to challenge them. You cant let those thoughts ruin your day, let them control you, or let your ED steer you. You STILL need to eat, ALL your meals even if you feel fat. Because i can guarantee you, you wont feel better by restricting. You might get an empty feeling, get a hunger feeling which some think equals being strong or happy or being thin. But that is not the case. You need to eat, fill your body with food. Go against the voice in your head. Its tough, but just listening to the voice in your head wont make you feel better or make those fat feelings go away.

Instead, put on some comfy clothes. Maybe avoid those skinny jeans or that tight black dress... or Hell, maybe wear those clothes. Defy your ED and show that actually, you can have fat feelings but still leave the house wearing a tight dress or a tight top. You shouldnt be ashamed of your body.
   But i often find that when i have those types of thoughts wearing more baggy and loose clothing can be comfortable.  Drinking tea to soothe your stomach and drinking water if you are bloated, and know that the bloating will pass. Give it time!!!¨

The fat feelings will pass as you get stronger. They come and go and even when you are recovered you might have days where you feel fat, but its important to remember that its not fat you are feeling. Its somethign else, and knowing what it is you are actually feeling can help solve the problems and feelings.



It can also help to write out on a piece of paper, I am NOT fat. I need fat on my body. And keep repeating it or writing it until you believe it and feel better.
  Or writing small positive notes and putting around the house or in your journal :)

I hope that these tips help if you are struggling with fat feelings. But know that they will pass, whether it takes a week, a month or several months... but you cant let them control you. You have to be stronger than them.

The feelings continue

Waking up with the same uncomfortable, fat feelings as yesterday..... I still cant quite figure out what it is that i am actually feeling :/ The thoughts/feelings sort of come and go during the day... So atleast they are not always there.
   And yesterday, even though i posted that transformation, i felt pretty awful in my own body. But when i was looking in the mirror, i just laughed at how easily i could change the way i looked... like i showed in the picture. If i focus more on keep a good posture, trying to smile, be positive it does make things a little better!!
  The good thing about being recovered is that these feelings dont last forever... sometimes i get them for a few hours, other times they last a few days, but not longer than that. When i was sick, the fat feelings. The feeling of being too big, and wanting to step out of my own skin, that was constantly.... there were rare moments where i could feel happy in my body...but most of the time i was just disgusted by the way i looked and felt.
   But also, i am stronger than when i was sick. They are not ED thoughts or feelings. Its just normal ,hormonal things im guessing. As most teenagers - even guys can get 'fat' feelings, or have days where they feel uncomfortable in their skin or dont like the way they look. SO its nothing strange with it.
  But i am stronger now... now i dont resort to compensation or starvation to get rid of the thoughts... infact i do the opposite. I do things which make me feel good. There is no point hiding away, that wont make myself feel better. And its better to do soemthign to get myself out of my thoughts and my head!!!

^¨Hahah, that became a little longer than expected!!

Im just after eating breakfast (zoats!!) and now im going to get ready for the day... what i will be doing today will come up in a post later!! :)

^^Shes not allowed to be on the sofa, so thats her guilty look that she has been caught!!!

What did you eat for breakfast today ? :)

Fat feelings

Today im having a bad body image day.... Feel awful, fat and dont at all like what i see in the mirror :/ 
  I know fat isnt a feeling... its something else. But i dont quite know what the actual feeling is... Nothing fits, nothing sits properly... its either too tight or too loose.
   I dont get these feelings so often, but when i do get them i try to think of other things... not let those thoughts and feelings consume me. Because then all i will do is sit at home and feel awful, and think about how fat i am/feel. Instead, i am going to get up and do something productive today.
 

What to do when you "feel fat"

What to do when you "feel" fat

1. Recognize that you’re feeling shitty. That’s okay. 
2. You’re not feeling too hot about your body. That’s okay. 
3. Think about what’s ACTUALLY making you feel shitty. 
4. Figured it out? Good. Now you don’t have to project your negative feelings and thoughts onto your body. 
5. Think about what you can do to address your feelings in a healthy way, like calling a friend, doing yoga, writing it down, listening to happy music, treating yourself to a nice bath or meal. 
6. But wait, you still feel shitty about your body. That’s okay. 
7. Go stand in front of the mirror, if you’re not there already. 
8. Even if the next few things sound ridiculous and unhelpful, let me just say, they worked for me (with time). 
9. Stand in front of the mirror, take a deep breath, and hug yourself. 
10. As you hug yourself, smile your most genuine smile, even if it starts off a little tense and unnatural. 
11. Now look at your reflection, keep hugging yourself and say, “You are beautiful.”
12. Continue the hugging as you say, “You are worthy and good enough.”
13. Do not let go as you say, “You’re feeling shitty about your body, but that doesn’t mean it’s shitty, or that you are a shitty person.”
14. Place your hands on the parts of yourself that need more love. (I tend to touch my stomach and thighs.)
15. Now with your hands placed, stare straight in the mirror and say, “I am not perfect, but that’s okay. I’m human and I am more than my body.” 
16. Give yourself one final hug, one last genuine smile, and say what you would say to a friend that needed your support and love. 
17. Do a quick, goofy dance in front of the mirror, preferably one that is very embarrassing and will make you laugh out loud. 
18. Repeat steps 9 - 17 until you start feeling better. 
19. Go on with your day. Maybe even use your talents and passions to do wonderful things in the world. 
20. Because that’s what you’re here for. Not for your body or for the money you make or for making everyone else happy. You’re here to be YOU. The world needs YOU. 

*Positive affirmations are powerful. If negative comments can bring you down, positive comments can just as well bring you up! Practice positive self talk. Be your own best friend. Treat yourself kindly.*

Source: body-peace: