Our first two classes, we had no teacher but we were still expeced to come to school... But i just didnt have the energy. I went to bed early yesterday, 10pm. but once again.. i didnt sleep well. I tossed and i turned and got up during the night... like every night for the past 2 weeks. My sleep has been so bad. Havent been able to get to sleep, and then not sleeping well, and getting up during hte night and then i can hardly manage the next day. I think thats why im having such negative thoughts.. im not getting enough sleep.
So today i slept in.. and i feel much better. Not so many bad thoughts.
Then i got to school at 10am, and had my english test. And then it was lunch, which i sat on my own with music playing loud, and looking back over pictures.
^^^I miss when i looked like that... Thin. but not 'anorexically thin'^^ But fo course.. i was far from happy there.
Im left wondering if im depressed? i dont know. Theres something wrong in my head anyway.. im not normal. Im not right. Im having mood swings...? But im pretty sure that all the negative thoughts have come because ive lost weight... Thats what usually happens... and once i start losing wieght im never happy with my body... so its just to gain the weight again.. to overcome my fear of the energy drinks again... :S
And then we only had 20 minutes of a class before we got to go home.. so im really happy, Im going to spend all this free time at home relaxing, watching over series. Sleeping... :) Im gonna see if i go for a walk, maybe a run? But im thinking going for a run wont be a good idea? We'll see xx
I think your body lookes better now then what it does in the one above
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