It feels so strange that its a Friday, its like ive gone around thinking its Saturday all day!!
I wanted to start my day with a long walk, but when i woke up it was basically a snowstorm outside, so no long walk for me :/ Hopefully it will stop snowing sometime soon so that i can begin going for more walks again, especially now when i have the time to do it :)
Today i was going to go for a pore extraction treatment. (Hahah, doesnt sound so fun, right?) But its actually me who wanted it... i want to feel fresh in my face.. get rid of all the nasty blackheads, and then keep my skin fresh and clean :) After lunch we drove to the clinic, but we were there before my appointment so my mum and I went to a cafe. I was already full from lunch but i thought i might as well get something so a little pink macaron for me and a chocolate ball for my mum!!! In Sweden there is the tradition of 'fika' (you can google it if you dont know what it is :) ) and its been forever since ive been to a cafe with my mum... when i was in recovery we went to cafes and had coffee and cake quite often. Mainly because part of my recovery and 'goals' were to test fear foods, but also that i then got to spend time with my mum.
So it felt good sitting in the cafe with my mum :)
And then i had my treatment... and i guess you could say it hurt. But i have a very high pain tolerance. I mean after self harming for years and getting tattoos, i just dont feel so much pain. But also all my life ive been poked and prodded with needles, so it wasnt that bad :)
Now my face is all red and blotchy though -_-
After that my step dad jjoined us and we drove to the supermarket where we bought a weeks worth of food :)
Now im home and baking bread - I got serious cravings for bread with peanut butter and jam & bread with egg and caviar!! So it will be several slices of bread eaten once its done :) Mmmmm
Also a little update... I know i am on my break now and you'd expect me to be able to post lots, but infact its going to be the opposite. I'll try write some posts and about the topics you've asked for. But i really cant promise anything. I dont want to feel any pressure that i have to write anything, because then i am more likely to not write.... So just letting you all know ;)
Oh I remember having a facial treatment 1,5 years ago, and the torture was just so loveable! Haha, I liked the steam though. And yes, my face was terribly red and _pitty_, the holes were absolutely screaming of ther existance for like a week! Well, since then I've used more of good products and have barely had any blackheads yet :)
ReplyDeleteYeah im hoping i can keep my face clear and clean now... :) Like a little 'start over' almost!
DeleteHello! I sent you an e-mail yesterday. I'd be so happy if you found some time to repeat on it! Thanks in advance!
ReplyDeleteI'll try get round to it soon.. i havent had time to reply to emails recently.
DeleteGoogled - 'fika' is basically like British tea except you have coffee instead of tea? :) The chocolate ball looks good!! (and much larger than the macaron?!)
ReplyDeleteI love pore extraction treatment but since I've become sick I haven't allowed myself to 'indulge' in such enjoyment. I have also missed having 'fika' with my mum - haven't done this in ages (not to mention the sweet treats...). Sometimes I really want to have my mum beside me (I'm living by myself now) and have fika with me everyday, and I believe this would help greatly with my recovery... however I would never ever say this out as it is such a selfish idea.
J
Hahah the macaron was like extra small and chocolate ball was extra big... haha!!
DeleteI know what you mean with the indulging.. but you know what. That is just your ED talking. Its ok to treat yourself. To treat yourself with yummy food and do things you enjoy... you dont need to keep punishing yourself. Ask yourself... why am i not worth being taken care of? Or not allowed to do things i enjoy? Why do you need to punish yourself.
And i know its tough to treat yourself, or eat a fear food... but you need to in recovery. And asking for help... spending time with your mum that is important. That is something which i have learnt in life. You never know what will happen... so talk to your mum. If it helps, message her. Or write on a note that you woul like to spend time with her, or if she could come and 'fika' with you. It is not selfísh at all. Infact if you were to tell her that, you would be very brave and be strong. Because you are going against your ED.
You have to do things which scare you, and step outside of your comfort zone in recovery.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteElenaFebruary 21, 2014 at 8:58 PM
ReplyDelete"Fika" sound like an amazing tradition! A bit like the 11 o'clock tea break in UK (I experienced it in Scotland).
How often do you usually have a fika/go for a fika?
Here in Germany we have a traditional coffee/tea break on Sunday (or Saturday) afternoon, around 4pm. And sometimes when my mum and me buy veggies and fruit at the market on Saturday we have a break in a café nearby (usually only a drink).
Enjoy your break from school and have a nice weekend :)
Elena
Hahah yeah it is a good tradition :) Not so often.... :/ I used to fika more frequently before, but now i dont have the time.
DeleteThat sounds really good :) Its nice to spend time with your parents during the weekend!! And thank you :)
I'll try get round to it soon.. i havent had time to reply to emails recently.
ReplyDeleteWish I had more one-on-one time with my mommy, but since I'm one of five, it's kind of hard to have the time to do so. Really cute pic of the two of you. :]
ReplyDeleteI've been wanting a pore extraction treatment for over a year now, or even just laser treatment to get rid of a few pimp-scars on my face. I have a medium tolerance for pain... so it probably would hurt for me, haha. :P
Have fun on your break! Are you planning on traveling anywhere during your break?
(And have you ever made peanut butter bread loaf? It's delicious!)