its like, from yesterday till today, it looks like ive gained 10kg over night.
I cant say i felt small yesterday, but.... compared to today... then yes.
all i seem to be doing is crying. having these huge like strops over my clothes, i hate it. i hate feeling like this. the tears jsut keep fallling.
It feels like ive gained a whole load of weight from yesterday till today. my thighs are nearly touching, my bottom sticks out, my stomach is just plump.
each time i look in the mirror, i burst into tears. im trying to avoid the mirror, but really, the only thing i want to do is look into the mirror, see my failure of a body, see how its being ruined.
i cant stand my body, but at the same time, all i want to do is stare at it.
I hate the way my clothes sit on me, the only thing i used ot be comfortable in was leggings/tights with a dress, so that i could hide my stomach.
but now i have the issue of... my legs are too big, my thighs dont look good in tights/leggings. so im no longer comfortable in that.
i feel i should walk around in a potatoe sack.
I cant wear my skinny jeans, im not comfortable in them, its too cold for skirts or shorts, i dont like tight tops, i cant wear tops, they have to be the like dress/tops... that leaves me to.... trackies... and hoodies.
what i usually wear. tank top, trackies and a hoody. but suddenly they dont sit right. suddenly my trackies dont hang off me, the hoodies arent as loose.
im changing and i hate every moment of it.
im left with nothing to wear. a wardrobe full of clothes, which i refuse to wear.
this is just impossible, i just want to be healthy, but i so badly want to be thin. and i cant have both....but why?
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